I am not over her/him. What do I do?

"Opinions are never meant to be permanent, It's my opinion. - Sonu Jatav "

Sonu Jatav - www.sonujatav.com

Love is beautiful. Love can be tricky sometimes.

You meet someone special. you talk & laugh with them. You spend some time with them. You make memories. You will have a good sleep, the best and deep one with a wide smile on your face. You wake up and the first thing you will do is "Hi, goood morning!".

Then you'll chit-chat a little and start your happy day with a beautiful feeling, the Love.

You know that whatever happens there is one person who has your back on. They will stand with you no matter what. They'll make any exceptions if they have to. You know that there is someone to whom you matter the most. And at the end of the day when they ask you " How was your day? ". Then you would tell how it was and share the whole day and you feel great.

You will look at the sky full of stars and think "This is the best person I have in my life and will give up anything for her/him. I know, It's so beautiful to love someone and have them love us back. It's just the best feeling one could ever have in their life. This person doesn't have to be your girlfriend or boyfriend, You may or may not get to choose one but it could be anyone.

I hope it never comes into your life but shit happens and here comes that one day! You know what I mean. The day you will have to say goodbye to the sweetest person and beautiful relationship you once had because of some indifferences and it's very painful. I know. I will skip the drama part here and move onto something useful.

Now either you want to move on with your life or ferociously trying to get back together and sticking with them. And I know how unpredictable, insecure, confused we become in this phase.

Well, I've tried both, I held onto it as long as I could. Then we parted our own ways. I was suffering from enormous pain along with a lot of other things that happen when a special relationship ends.

I wanted it all to be over soon. I started to erase everything, blocking on social media and other connections, ignoring anyone who could possibly talk about them. The absolute priority was to keep me busy with things and not to look back. This was all happening outside of me. I always knew that my real fight wasn't with the outside world but with me only. Days we passing and It was not a single day I didn't miss how things used to be. It was very hard but I told myself that "It's fine, It's okay! Just one more day, tomorrow will be better. Hold onto it tight." I resisted my feelings as best as I could.

It has been a year. I thought I could trap all of it, moments and memories, put it in some box, and bury it somewhere in the past. I tried my best to do so. But I was wrong. I was not only burying my relationships' moments and memories but a good part of me as well. A part of me that I and everyone cherish and It's all I've really ever had. When I realized this I sat down and started to reflect on my thoughts, thinking, and what I've become and lost my way and It wasn't only the person I loved but some friends whom I really loved, part of me which was a writer. I realized that it's not fair to me. It doesn't have to be this way!

I let my guard down. I stopped resisting. I realized how much I loved her and remembered the best she brought into me. It was beautiful and best lived moments and memories of my life. Isn't it everyone's best thing in their life?

We don't need to focus on getting rid of bad memories but we must focus on living with good memories. We must cherish the beautiful time we got to live because it's very rare.

It's okay! It's fine! I understand if you're going through a hard time or had a break-up. But we don't need to keep grudges or resist our feeling! The longer we hold, The heavier it becomes. Resistance will always keep you trapped, acceptance will set you free.

Okay! Maybe more later. I hope you liked my blog. Would love to hear from you, do write me back sometimes. Thank you for reading. See you soon with a new perspective.